She knows what the pain looks like. Not only the pain of being destroyed or deceived. She suffered extreme grief following the loss of a loved one . The type of grief where the person you miss never comes back. She is strong because she has a relationship with someone, someone beautiful, breathtaking. Someone who deserved to live a long healthy life without suffering. But he was ripped off.
She did not have enough time with this person. She did not tell him everything she should have. It’s unfair, but she’s learned to accept that life is done that way. The universe does not favoritism. And that’s normal, even if it’s not really fair.
Her strength was tested the day she heard the news, and every day since. She wondered. She wondered about her beliefs. Her strength was put to the test, but she never gave up completely. If it were, she would not be here anymore.
But she is still here. She is still breathing. The death of this loved one has made her strong, because she is still alive, even if he is gone.
Because she faced the worst possible circumstances and survived. The mourning of one. Funerals. The speeches. The messages attached to the flowers. She went through the most difficult moments, moments when she would have liked to be able to disappear, where she would have liked to exchange her place with the person who left, but she is still able to smile. Laughing. To enjoy life.
Of course, she has not finished crying. She will cry again when she flips through her albums or sees a memory with this person on Facebook. When she crosses the cemetery or she will look at the urn of her loved one disappeared on her shelf. When it’s late at night or early in the morning and she can not sleep. But these tears do not make her weak. They make it strong. They make her a survivor.
She is strong because she has faced the biggest loss that can be imagined. She knows what the unstoppable pain is like, how it feels when someone misses us and we can not see it. Someone whose name can be screamed, but who will never give a concrete answer.
She is strong because she did not let death turn her into someone cynical. She always has a huge heart. She still has a lot of love to give.
She is strong because she is there for her friends every time they experience a similar loss. Because he is someone that other people can rely on. Because she does not let the horrors of her past haunt her. She is strong, because if she could overcome the death of someone she loved more than words can express, she can overcome everything.