Narcissistic perverse women are a real scourge, as are their male colleagues. However, they are much more dangerous in our society because they go unnoticed. They are excused or worse, understood in their abuses. On the other hand, male victims who dare to testify are often mistaken for mythomaniacs or weak-minded people. Nothing is more wrong.
Narcissistic perversion in the feminine generally chooses men of a strong character but (and?) With a strong need to exist as a male figure . Thus, they are often “men who can be counted”, “men who take charge”. It is clear that this category of men has many more resources (emotional, social and / or financial) than more vulnerable people.
Small point / disclaimer: everyone must appeal to his individual discernment. The articles I am posting are written with the aim of shedding light on the narcissistic perversion. Each reader must inquire and learn about the subject before laying a charge on a third person. A relationship can be perceived as “toxic” without a PN being involved. It’s not a fad.
The difference between a narcissistic perverse woman and a structural manipulative woman
Know that each of us may have to manipulate, to get out of a bad situation or to get a profit. This is called “circumstantial manipulation”. There are people who handle permanently. This is called “structural manipulation”.
Both manipulative women and narcissistic perverse women use manipulation as a mode of interaction to each other except that their intentions and motivations are different. Naturally, the chosen targets do not have the same characteristics either.
A narcissistic perverse woman needs to “feed herself” on the psyche of the other. What she can not do with a man says fragile. If you are the victim of such a woman, it is because she has seen in you a great inner strength, a true existence of her own which will be pillaged, sacked and left behind.
The more fragile profiles interest the “pure” manipulators . They take what to take and leave. There is a grip that is put in place but no projective identification and guilt is less pronounced or non-existent. This is not the main means of manipulation found in the testimonies.
The specter of narcissistic perversion necessarily includes these 5 elements (for those who want to go fast , otherwise read the 20 criteria – DO NOT CONFUSE WITH THE 30 CRITERIA OF ISABELLE NAZARE AGA FOR HANDLING):
Double face (Angel / Demon) + Pathological Lie (permanent and at all times – Extremely convincing) + Guilty of the other + Projective identification (reproaching the other with what one is oneself, what one is done and what one intends to do) + Great sense of self (the narcissistic trait).
Behind the mask of emotional dependence …
If you read most of the testimonies of male victims of narcissistic perverse women, you will notice the presence of essential markers.
First, it is women who move from one relationship to another as easily as we change underwear . The men with whom they are supposedly “in pairs” are as important as accessories and are interchangeable whether they have children with them or not. Men who see them with an outside eye interpret this as “emotional dependence” or “emotional fragility”.
These women are often portrayed as victims of previous abusive relationships and are almost always accompanied by prey when they meet the new “partner”. The testimony of Charles is the perfect example which illustrates their mode of operation. A man who starts a relationship with a woman already in a relationship / relationship should expect in 99% of cases to be left or handled in the same way. Especially if the relationship has a “secret” aspect , which is the mark of manipulation. A person who cheats on his partner with you, will deceive you the same way. If you can identify this as a recurring mode of operation / lifestyle , and in addition, the ex-companions have all lost something in the process, run away. One day YOU will be part of these ex.
The narcissistic perverse women act in this way to play on the sensitive chord of men who have a strong fondness for the “savior” side . Those who need to feel appreciated, useful, who want to take care of someone are narcissistic perverse women’s magnets. We must be wary of this tendency to let go of one liana for another systematically and also pay attention to women who are involved in multiple parallel relationships. Know that you will one day be part of the “players” denigrated then brutally removed from the game.
Narcissistic perverse women obviously do not need to be saved at all, but they know exactly how to make that chord vibrate in their prey. Unlike other purely emotional, but also toxic, profiles (such as borderline women, for example), a narcissistic, nasty woman knows exactly what she’s doing, why she’s doing it, and when the target will not be useful. . And of course, the next one is already on the waiting list.
Disclaimer: All unfaithful women are not necessarily NPs . We must analyze the overall behavior to know which profile it is exactly. What shows the malign character is the intention behind the action.
The specificity of narcissistic perverse women
Narcissistic perverse men and women have the same characteristics:
- Permanent manipulation and pathological lie
- Superficial emotions
- Exploitation of others
- Exploitation of the vulnerabilities of others for personal benefit
- Dehumanization and objectification of others
- Inability to love
- Will of psychic destruction of others
- Chronic infidelity
- Great sense of self and feeling of omnipotence
If these personality traits are found with women and men narcissistic perverse, the first, the expression of these is different, more subtle, more diffuse and deeper. Narcissistic perverse women take the time to put their hold on their targets, they deepen – apparently – the degree of intimacy between them and their partners.
Although they perceive something troubled, which is inevitably the case when one is interacting with a person who manipulates, they are unable to move … before the mask falls permanently. And even when it does, their belonging to the “weaker sex” is a parasitic one on the clear vision of this particular psychological profile.
Moreover, the male victims undergo what I call the “double punishment” : not only, they must undergo the long ordeal of procedures, testimonies, evidence to collect, children to protect from a companion totally centered on it -even and terribly malicious; but in addition, as men – the strong sex – they come up against the unbelief of institutions. This makes their journey even more painful than that of women victims of narcissistic perverse men.
The golden rule for not falling into the trap : take the time to analyze the person, ask him questions, meet his entourage (if you have permission). These women – like men – are pushing the rhythm of the relationship, because they know that the mask will not hold on indefinitely. They need your commitment as soon as possible: great declarations of love after a few days, marriage / engagement in a few months, sometimes with the conception of a child (think carefully before involving an innocent person), moving in, moving out, etc. Only time and clear vision can help you avoid falling into the trap. The PN profiles are very very subtle, especially at the beginning, and know how to simulate the emotions to perfection but the time ends up dropping the mask.
The forgotten victims: the children of narcissistic perverse women
Let’s also talk about forgotten victims: children born to narcissistic perverse women. Unable to escape the grip of a devastating and predatory mother, they end up invariably destroyed in the depths of their personality. The abuses are first denied by the mother, imposed, masked, nonexistent in her eyes but very real in the heart of a child. This inevitably affects the adult life of this child, whether it is obvious or hidden. There is ALWAYS a price to pay in interpersonal relationships.
A mother is the first human being, the first object of love for every human being. When this mother is in a predatory interaction with her own child, and especially, that she makes sure to be the only authority figure as is often the case, it becomes more and more difficult to get out of perverse web and see the world in a positive, benevolent way. The father is quickly removed from the life of the child so that no one calls into question the omnipotence of the narcissistic perverse mother. Either he is physically eradicated, or the relationships are so conflicting that he withdraws emotionally. Or unfortunately, it is an immature and irresponsible father.
This climate of danger, isolation, this feeling of “being able to rely only on oneself” creates a fear of living for adults who will become victims of PN spouses and, conversely, a feeling of “the others do not exist. If I am not the executioner, I am the victim “who is at the base of the fantasized omnipotence of the narcissistic perverts.
Narcissistic perverse women are more masked than their male colleagues, but what really makes their difference is the blindness of our society. Women, carriers of life, can also be formidable predators.