If you know someone who is suffering from anxiety, here are 9 REALLY things you need to know.

But for someone who suffers from anxiety attacks, it does not happen at all like that. Sometimes a very small thing can have an uncontrollable impact on our mind, until it becomes really disproportionate to the real gravity of the situation.

Anxiety attacks are not logical and our response is not rational … And believe me, we are well aware.

Seriously, you must believe me: we know it. It is useless to tell us that our way of behaving is disproportionate, that we “make plans on the comet”: this is precisely the essence of this type of disorder. As we well know, what we imagine in our anxiety attacks is disproportionate and is unlikely to really happen to us.

And that’s what’s most frustrating: knowing that we are panicking for something that should not (logically) make us panic, but be helpless in the face of this emotion of anguish and fear . It is as if our mind was malfunctioning with our fire alarm, which would trigger its sirens even because of the smallest smoke or lighter dust.

Because of anxiety, there are good times and bad days.

Of course, every person has their bad days and good days … But it’s even more true with anxiety, and sometimes those who suffer from it would like their loved ones to realize what this really means: There is moments when anxiety is stronger than others, and days when we are calm.

And that influences how we react to situations, which can make us think we are unpredictable.

Anxiety attacks cause pain. Mentally, but also physically.

Some people might say that emotional pain is still the worst – but most know that, without knowing that there is also physical pain.

Yes, anxiety hurts. During panic attacks, we feel our chest tighten to the point of having the impression that our lungs will explode, as if we could not breathe.

Anxiety can also lead to migraines, nausea, heart palpitations, muscle tension, insomnia, exhaustion, dizziness … Some people have the feeling of getting something torn in the stomach, others contract so much that their body the whole thing is curtailed.

Yes, it hurts. It does not hurt in the same way for everyone, but it hurts.

We are not all equal before anxiety.

There is not just one kind of anxiety, but many different types of anxiety – and each individual can experience anxiety in his own way.

There are those who suffer from social anxiety, those who have generalized anxiety disorders, or others who have specific phobias.

Some people suffer from anxiety because of their genes, others develop anxiety because of events in their lives.

For others, anxiety is due to chemical reactions in their brains. Some will be anxious throughout their lives and can not do anything, for others it will be a passage in their lives. There are those who will manage to overcome anxiety and find a solution to make it more acceptable. There are people who take drugs, and others who do not take them. This is how.

Anxiety and depression are related.

Of course, not all anxious people are necessarily depressed, and not all depressed individuals are necessarily anxious people. But both are common companions – and one can guide the other.

Of course, I think many people already know that … But I want you to realize that those who suffer from it know that too.

We are very aware of this, and it can even make us terribly anxious or depressed (and for once, it’s a rather rational fear, when we know what depression implies!)

Unless you’re asked explicitly, when it comes to someone else’s anxiety, you’d better listen rather than talk.

You know, when you say something mean about someone in your family, but if someone else told you, you’d want to break his face? Well, it’s the same.

Also – and it should go without saying, it’s never a good idea to talk about someone’s mental health with another person without them knowing it. If someone has opened up to you and told you something about himself, especially that sort of thing, that does not mean he wants other people to know it. This kind of problem is still strongly stigmatized, and many people do not really want us to know what they live on a daily basis. For some, it’s even one of the things that makes them the most anxious. So, it’s better to avoid that.

As frustrating, heartbreaking, exhausting, unbearable, and suffocating as they are, our experiences and problems with anxiety are an integral part of us, and we would not be completely ourselves without them.

This is, I think, one thing that people who suffer from anxiety disorders (myself included) have trouble understanding and apprehending. We spend so much time trying to fight this inner enemy that it can become like a second form of consciousness within our brain: A fight that we have to carry on constantly, in order to hope to live a full, happy and productive life . But the reality of the situation, as always, is a little more complex than that.

Although anxiety is something we have to deal with on a daily basis, it’s still an integral part of us. It influences us in the choices we make, in our way of seeing the world, it even shapes our personality little by little.

To see it only as an enemy or a thing to heal is to reject that part of us and to take away any value from it.

It’s hard to accept, and yet it can do a lot of good. It is perfectly acceptable to be anxious person, and there is no shame to have.

And to conclude, the most important thing you should know:

If you know someone who is suffering from this, ask them what you can do to help them, ideally at a time when they are not in a panic attack.

The worst thing you can do is add a layer … And it’s pretty tricky, because you could do it without even realizing it.

People who suffer from this kind of disorder are often hypersensitive and perceive many things in the behaviors of others. This may also lead to anxiety – the perception of just too many things.

The frustration you feel about our lollipop thoughts, your tiredness, the fact that you find us hard to bear, your annoyance, your desire that we can simply stop when we have a crisis: We know that you feel these things. This is seen as the nose in the middle of the figure. And then, we feel that too with ourselves, do not forget it. We too are frustrated, tired, angry with ourselves. And we, too, would really like to be able to stop in the middle of a crisis. In fact, the only difference between you and us is that we feel that all the time. That’s why we understand how you feel about us, and we do not blame you for that – it’s quite normal.

And if you ask and the person just does not know what they need, know that everyone needs love, especially those who tend not to love themselves at the grassroots level. Really, it’s sometimes surprising how little things can change everything: A smile, a reassuring word, a compliment, a sandwich …

Love and affection are what we need. It’s usually hard to go wrong with these things.

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