If you have experienced this moment when you have had to leave the person you loved because you were aware that maintaining this relationship was as painful as it was self-destructive, you undoubtedly know how difficult it is to make such a decision.
What everyone needs to know, especially teenagers who start their first affective stories, is that true love does not hurt.
Love must be beautiful, comforting and wise, so that “I love you” and “I love myself” are not antagonistic.
We invite you here to reflect on this.
I love you enough to love you with all my soul
Whoever does not love oneself can hardly establish a sincere and lasting relationship. It is clear that none of us are wise artisans of affection, correspondence and complicity that includes, respect and builds true happiness.
Who does not love …
- Whoever does not love oneself seeks out others to satisfy their shortcomings and emotional needs.
- It is impossible to listen to our self-esteem and our identity when we have an affective relationship with someone who does not love himself. We focus all our energies on listening, on making each other happy.
- Sometimes, when we fall in love with someone who does not love himself, we think that we will act as “saviors”, that we will be the answer to his problems and the light of his torments.
- Yet what happens is that we are emotionally exhausted, to the point of forgetting ourselves.
I love you enough to love you as you deserve
A mature relationship is a conscious relationship where none of the members of the couple blackmails, where “what is yours and what is mine”, let alone the “because I tell you”.
In a mature relationship, I can say “I love myself” because I know it’s only when I feel myself to be a complete person, without fear of loneliness and who knows how to build happiness that I can give the best from me to the other.
- If I love myself, I will not force you to extinguish my fears, to cover my deficiencies, to be my savior or to give me oxygen every time I need to breathe.
I forgive you, but I leave you
As we explained at the beginning, most of us had to leave someone we loved once in our life. The reason for this distance can be treason, fatigue or the fact that we realize that we are not loved as we deserve.
- Whatever the cause of this break, it is necessary to realize it through forgiveness. It can be difficult, our heart can break in the face of so much pain, but it’s the only way to close this stage of our lives.
- Self-esteem and dignity are the authentic nutrients of the heart, those which allow to always act in maturity even in the most complicated moments.
- Without self-esteem, we could continue to maintain a toxic relationship solely for fear of being alone, for fear of leaving the person we love and even if it makes us unhappy, we prefer because we are afraid of being without the other.
We must not fall into this type of situation. Self-esteem is the one that gives us that personal courage to leave something when there is no future possible, when the only thing it brings us is tears instead of joy.
Remember: you will never be selfish in remembering each day that you love yourself and that you deserve to be happy.
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