The goal of gaslighting is to slowly destroy another person’s confidence in their own perception, so it can be difficult to notice for someone who is a victim. But there are some signs of gaslighting that are telling, no matter how long you’ve been in it.
1. DISCOURAGE YOU DO NOT BECOME TALKING TO OTHERS OF ALL THAT IS IMPORTANT
An individual who is gasping on someone does not want their victim to seek advice or emotional comfort from someone else. If the person who criticizes you constantly and demands the most of your time, also tells you that others are not trustworthy, spread rumors about your friends or become jealous for no reason and upset when you talk to others people, it’s probably gaslighting.
2. YOU ARE SOMETIMES COMPLIMENTS FOR YOU TO STAY
Gaslighters may seem crazy, but they are not stupid. If they only insulted you, you would end up suspicious and go away. Like most abusive relationships, gaslighting only works if the victim sometimes feels needed, loved, desired or cared for.
The occasional kindness after a relentless criticism is what leaves the gaslighting sufferer constantly in doubt, this can even destroy his confidence. It’s easy to identify and discredit an abuser if he just abuses you, but by mixing false hope with short-term goodness, the gaslighter has bargaining power.
3. HE DOES NOT SAY HIS BEHAVIOR, ONLY YOURS
According to the gaslighter, it’s never him the problem. He never has serious mental problems. A gaslighteur always describes himself as the healer, and the patron saint of patience while you are the hopeless case.
Gaslighting is the act of creating a new set of rules so that another can live them by simultaneously putting pressure on him to lose confidence in himself. It only works if the victim is constantly reminded that she is ignorant, helpless, confused, on the verge of depression.
4. THE FACTS DO NOT COUNT FOR HIM, HE DENIES THE TRUTHY TRUTHS AND TELLS EVIDENT LIES WITHOUT SCRUPULA
Its ultimate goal is to tell you how to think. A person who does gaslighting to feel powerful and helpful does not care about real life. She is very serious and does not stare as she exaggerates beyond reason, denying truths and fabricating new truths.
In fact, the gaslighter can do everything possible to discuss the truth with you as often as possible just to stay on the defensive and eventually give up and prove it right.